And the day begins. Summer has begun. The days are longer, kids are home from school, you become more of an uber driver and craziness ensues. Through all the camps, friends, family visits, vacations how do you find time for yourself? How do you not get overwhelmed by all that needs to be done? You know when you are that sinking feeling hits hard deep in your belly and chest. The heat swells like a fire raging up your spine. So before the steam comes screaming from your ears like a whistling tea kettle consider these ideas.
Number one on the list is keep a calendar! It doesn’t really matter what kind, there are millions if you are a digital person consider google calendar or iCal. These are nice because you can sync them with other people’s calendars in the family to know who is where when. Believe it or not I still love the paper calendar. I like to see it in bold print. Also, when I write it down I’m more likely to remember it. When I see the whole month laid out in front of me I am able to figure out where I can fit in time for myself. The first thing I always put on the calendar is my yoga practice. Yes I put it on the calendar. Do you know why? Because if I don’t I won’t do it and before you know it I’ve spent all my time teaching yoga and carting kids around and that feeling of overwhelm kicks in. Then I put in my teaching schedule. Those are the two things that drive my calendar. After those things are in I put in all appointments, kids schedules, vacations etc… When everything is entered I then look at places where I can squeeze in a run or hike. But remember I began planning my calendar around my yoga practice; that is sacred time for me. Where do you plan for your sacred time?
The second most important things is don’t over schedule. I recall the phrase 10 pounds of s**t in a five pound bag. Yes, you want your kids to have a fun summer and do lots of different things, but ask yourself do you really want to drive them there? It’s ok for kids to have to find their own entertainment. Don’t get me wrong camps and play dates are amazing but having them know how to play on their own is priceless! No is a beautiful word. Plus, if you haven’t over scheduled them there is more time for you and for your family. Maybe you want to take a day trip or do a family hike.
Third create a plan. You can be flexible within that plan, but none the less have a plan. The days that make me the most crazy are when I have NO plan, not even a skeletal plan ~ you know the ones. The ones when you think maybe I’ll do this and then I can go…. I always think “Oh yes! A day with nothing, who-hoo! But then it just gets wasted and I rarely get anything accomplished or do what I would really like. Best bet is to write something down commit to it and put some boundaries around it. If you don’t you’ll find yourself pulled in a million different directions and feeling like you can’t do anything right. You’ll be left with that awesome feeling of guilt that slowly eats away at your self-confidence and at the end of the day you’ll be saying where the heck did that day go?!?!
Fourth, let go of the guilt that any of this may cause. This is a hard one because as parents we want our children to be happy and know that we are there for them. But for those times that they come and ask you for something and you are trying to get something else done before answering yes my darling of course I will help you stop and ask a few questions. Does this have to be done right now? How soon do you need it? Can anyone else help you? These three simple questions cannot only open an amazing conversation but it eliminates drama and teaches your own children to plan. It also shows them that you are more than their Mom or Dad but that you have a life too. You have things that need to get done. Once you know the answers to all the questions then you can find the best option that works for you. It also eliminates the guilt. Someone once told me that guilt is really just fear that you are doing something wrong. If you open up a conversation there won’t be guilt because everyone gets a voice and the best decision is made.