Last night I was reading a book on the Yama’s and Niyama’s and came across an interesting quote from Yogiraj Anchala, “What are you not seeing because you are seeing what you are seeing?” It caused me pause. How much do we miss in a day because we only see what we want? When we look at a sunset, at our children, partner, or pet, what are we missing? What if instead we look beyond what is right in front of us? For instance, your daughter comes downstairs looking like a unicorn threw up on her. Instead of screaming in horror over the blinding array of colors why not see her creative side and pay her a compliment. See what follows…..
The same is true with any argument or inconvenience. We get fixated with our side and how right we are. The other person is totally in the wrong and their timing is just so inconvenient! Maybe it’s actually happening to show you something else, to teach you something else. Recently I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend right before I left for a few days of skiing and we didn’t talk for most of the trip. Partially, because I was stunned and confused but also because I was in Utah skiing at the amazing mountain, Snowbird in the Wasatch-Cache forest.
That miscommunication, that argument, caused me to be really focused on my skiing and my trip. Out on the hill, as I was coming down, I could feel my feet pressing into the boots. The movement of the skis sliding on the snow, the sweat dribbling down my back as my lungs burned from the high altitude. I was 100% present and it felt amazing! My mind completely clear. My only thoughts were on the invisible lines blazoned in the snow marking my descent. A childish glee swelled up inside my body and filled my heart joy. As I made my way down the mountain and came to rest at the bottom I realized it had been months since I had no other thought in my mind, except for what I was doing. No need to reach out to anyone, no need to solve a problem, no deadline to meet, no class to prepare. My only thoughts were how my body floated over my skis and how I would remain upright until I reached the bottom. My legs would burn, western trails are far superior to the short east coast ones. No matter how much training you do nothing can really prepare you for long, steep trails and high altitude. It’s really like reaching heaven yet remaining on earth.
There was no texting; no interruption. I only pulled out my phone when I needed to take a picture. Communications only occurred after dinner or around the time I needed to find my daughter or meet my cousins for dinner. No one was popping up on my screen to chat or sending me a notification that a document needed to be signed. I didn’t want to talk so I put away my biggest distraction and it felt great. Had I not gotten into the argument I’m certain my trip would have been very different. Would I have been so present? I’m not so sure. We have now been trained to stay connected through texting, snapchat and other forms of social media. The argument allowed me to put away my phone and only pull it out when deemed necessary.
The argument also gave me the luxury of time and space. Time for me and space to grow. It allowed me the time to realize how much I miss the west and my deep love for snow and skiing. It allowed me to FEEL tremendous joy. It helped me come back to center and remember who I was. Yes, let’s face it and I am totally guilty…. I get lost in being a mom, someone’s girlfriend, a yoga teacher and yes, my work. Don’t you? I know I forget to take care of myself. I put others needs in front of mine. That’s what we do as women… I forget how important it is to stay in my center and work from there. We all have better results when we are working from or core being. The argument made me see that even when I go to my mat I am not purely focused on the practice. I’m thinking about my next class or how to incorporate a new move or what should I teach tonight????? When do you turn off your mind and become fully present? How do you do it? Had I not had an argument I would not have remembered how. I would not have remembered that I hadn’t been present and how much I was actually missing.
The moral of all this is to look beyond what is happening to you in the moment. Look at the good that comes out of the bad. Look for the beauty in the mistake. Look at the adventure created by a wrong turn. Not the interruption to your trip or the added length. The delayed flight does not happen to inconvenience you but to show you something. Look beyond the inconvenience and see what lies there. Look for the truth in the situation. Ultimately there is a reason and it is always to support you in some way. So, the next time your child breaks a plate or you argue with your spouse look beyond it and see how it is helping you, not hindering you. Find your truth.
~Namaste